Arsenal tell Barca to fuck-off with their borrowed wealth

Arsenal Fc have finally jilted Fc Barcelona, whose season-long romance with their captain has been the subject of intense speculation in the media


A statement on the Gunners official website revealed that there was no love lost between both parties involved in the stalemate:

"Arsenal captain Cesc Fabregas is under contract with the Club until the summer of 2015. He is a highly-valued member of the team and part of our future plans.

"We have followed recent speculation linking Cesc with a move away from the Club but as there has never been any official approach for him, only two informal exchanges, in which we made it abundantly clear that we have no interest in transferring Cesc, we have refrained from publicly passing comment. However, yesterday evening we received an offer from Barcelona for Cesc and in response, we immediately and resolutely told them once again that we have no intention of selling our captain.

"To be clear, we will not make any kind of counterproposal or enter into any discussion. Barcelona have publicly stated that they will respect our position and we expect that they will keep their word."
 
At least that is enough to dissuade any club that might fancy the idea of asking-out any of our players in the near future.